I think I have “Guilty Mom Syndrome”
Today was just not a good day. I will not bore you with all the details. If you are a mother, you already live them…every day! I’ve been lying here in my bed for several hours trying to come up with something profound to write today. Instead my mind was flooded with all the things I did ‘wrong’ today.
- I neglected to put God first by saying my prayers and reading my scriptures
- I yelled at my kids because they were acting horrible.
- I broke my healthy diet and binged on Chik-fil-a followed by a trip to Target for a treat which ended up being several that are now hidden in the master bedroom shower. (don’t tell the kids!)
- I didn’t exercise.
- I’m hiding from my kids.
- I can keep going…
- Do I really need to say more??
Then I started to think of all the things I constantly feel guilt for as a mother. It is an ON-GOING NON STOP mental and emotional battle. From the minute my kids were born I have found more and more things to feel guilty of.
I don’t know. I guess it’s because I absolutely love to torture myself everyday. So why not just feel guilty….
Why the heck do we do this to ourselves? I hear it all the time with moms everywhere…
- Guilty for not breastfeeding, guilty FOR breastfeeding,
- Guilty for getting an epidural, guilty for NOT,
- Guilty for putting kids in front of a TV,
- Guilty for getting upset at a child who is behaving like a monster,
- Guilty for spending too much, or not enough,
- Guilty for eating too much, or not enough,
- Guilty for being too fat or too skinny,
- Guilty for not feeding our families a 3 course dinner,
- Guilty for not being sexy enough for our husbands,
- Guilty for not wanting to be sexy (Can I please have some personal space? I just spent the past 24 hrs with children….all over me!)
- Guilty for having children who don’t behave…..
Well it’s no wonder we have no energy or stamina by the end of the day! While it’s true that the hand that rocks the cradle ROCKS the world, there’s no need for us to take the whole world on our shoulders. After all, the world never asked us to! I’m not saying that I’m gonna start a lazy mom’s group where our creed is
“I gave birth….the end!”
But I’m not gonna lie when I say that sometimes I feel like hanging a plaque on my wall that says:
“MOTHER: Guilty as charged!”
Maybe we shouldn’t feel guilty at all but instead grateful. Grateful for all the things that we’re DOING. Because if we’re doing anything it all it means we haven’t GIVEN UP! And gosh golly, any kid who has a parent that refuses to give up is a lucky kid. The next time you’re tempted to feel guilty because someone 3 feet high accuses you of not performing your “motherly duties” you can politely say,
“I gave birth to you….and you’re still ALIVE!” (sarcasm intended)
But in a more sincere tone, I AM guilty, and I should be tried for the following:
- Guilty for choosing to bring life into this world,
- Guilty for changing enough diapers to fill the Grand Canyon,
- Guilty for spending countless hours rocking babies to sleep,
- Guilty for loving a child so deeply, I would give my life for them,
- Guilty for getting out of bed each and every day regardless of how much sleep I’ve gotten,
- Guilty for loving my Husband (even if he doesn’t respect my personal space:),
- Guilty for wanting my kids to have the very best in life even if it means I get to be the ‘mean mom.’
- Guilty for being a Child of God.
- Guilty for partnering with God in the most important work on this earth.
- Guilty…for being a MOTHER.
Are you feeling Guilty Mom? If so, I hope it’s for the right reasons!