*Be sure to check out my quick and simple Family Night idea at the end of this post!
I.HATE.DANDELIONS! Just when I pick 10, 30 more appear the next day. They are SO resilient and stubborn and seem to thrive in the worst conditions. They remind me of the negative conditions in my home sometimes. The yelling, tattle-telling, crying, whining & teasing. The negative media that has its way of creeping in sometimes when we watch too many movies or listen to too much radio. The hybernating in front of a screen to escape the reality of what is real.
Oh yes! and then there’s the kids…
I remember sitting in church one time when a mother raised her hand and made a comment I will never forget. We were talking about making our homes a better place to live in, and she said,
“We need to focus more on feeding the PLANTS, not the WEEDS in our homes.”
It was an ‘aha!’ moment for me. It’s so easy to grow weeds! You.just.do.nothing. Weeds just seem to grow everywhere. But plants require so much more water, sun and attention. If they are not taken care of, the weeds will eventually overgrow them and choke the life out of them. The same goes with my home. It takes so much more effort to actually nurture and love than it does to turn on the tv, holler at the kids, or just ignore the negative behavior that tempts to drive me over the edge.
Last night my 6 yr old son woke up at 2 am wanting to climb in bed with us. (NOT the first time this has happened. We’ve been fighting this battle for some time)
I said no.
He didn’t like that and proceeded to throw a fit which then woke up the baby. Then, after his dad got upset and told him to go to his bed, he screamed for the next 30 minutes over and over and over again. He’s 6. there’s nothing like a six-year-old screaming at the top of his lungs at 2 am to just fry the nerves. I could have just let him climb into bed with us. That would have solved the problem…temporarily…until the next night. So, I just closed my door, locked it and tried my best to plug my ears and go back to sleep. Not sure how long he kept It up or when I actually fell asleep, but this morning I asked him how he had slept.
“Just fine.” he said with a smile
What kind of weeds do you have growing at YOUR house? Do you have the kind with deep roots that seem to always come back no matter how hard you try to get rid of them? Our front yard was absolutely beautiful when we moved into this house. Unfortunately, my husband I and both stink at keeping up with yard work. By the end of the day, we are so exhausted with work and kids, it’s just the last thing on our minds. Over the past few years, the dandelions have slowly been getting worse and worse. I finally broke down and paid for a lawn service and after 1 treatment our lawn is already looking amazing again! I can’t believe I didn’t do this a long time ago! Why did I put it off for so long?
How do the bad habits in our homes get out of control? It’s the same cycle, right? Life gets stressful, and we keep adding things to the bottom of our to do lists and they just keep growing and growing…
Do any of the following statements ring true at your house?
My kids are watching too much tv, but I’m too tired to entertain them.
My health is going downhill. I’ll start eating healthy after this last trip to my favorite restaurant or this last milkshake.
My child is hanging out with the wrong crowd, and I feel like I am losing them.
I want to get out of debt. If only I could just stop spending too much.
My kids won’t stop fighting and I can’t handle the chaos.
My smart phone is my escape from the reality that surrounds me.
I would be absolutely lying if I said I have never experienced these same scenarios in my own home at one time or another. The truth is, those weeds have a way of slowly creeping into our lives and before we know it our lives look a lot like my front yard and we wondered how it happened. But weeds can be eliminated, even if it takes help from the experts. But HOW??
By FEEDING the PLANTS!
Instead of focusing on all the things you’re doing wrong and feeding those bad habits, focus on all the things you are doing RIGHT or the things you WANT to have happen in your home and then give all your heart and soul to that! It’s kind of like when I am trying to lose weight. If I focus on all the things I’m NOT supposed to eat, eventually it becomes too stressful and I give up. However, if I gradually just try to ADD the things that I know will nourish my body, eventually there isn’t enough room for the other.
Homes can be healed and people CAN change! I know, because I have seen it in my life so many times.
It’s a constant battle weeding out the bad behavior and nurturing the good! But as we feed the PLANTS, the weeds become easier to pull and eventually life becomes beautiful again. It does pay off, just not as fast as we would always like. So, if you remember nothing from what I’ve said so far, just remember this one simple thing. Everyday ask yourself one question:
“What am I watering? The WEEDS or the PLANTS?”
Speaking of which, it’s late, I should be asleep already, and I think my son is awake…again, throwing yet another fit.
Did I mention how much I HATE weeding?
This is a great lesson for family night! Here is a great way to teach your children how to recognize bad habits and change them:
Show them a picture of a weed and then a picture of a flower, ask them if they know the difference between the 2.
Explain that a weed will eventually take water and nourishment from the flower if it is not pulled.
How is a weed just like a bad habit and what can we do to get rid of it?